Monday, 14 May 2012

Which Avenger Is Best ? (Part 2) Hawkeye and The Hulk (Spoilers)

I'll throw a SPOILER ALERT right here again in case you missed it. Below I review each Avenger and some other important characters to decide who the best is. There will be several systems of voting including:
  • Badassness - How badass are they? I need some DAYYUMM moments. 
  • Wit - Can they make you laugh or banter brilliantly?
  • Intelligence - What smarts do they have?
  • Heart - Are they a team player? What is their limit? Would the sacrifice themselves for the world?
  • Style -  How good do they look while they do what they do?
  • Hotness - Hotness impacts how much we want to watch them...
This will hopefully determine the Best Avenger.

Hawkeye/ Agent Clint Barton

  • Badassness- Using a bow instead of another weapon makes you a badass from the go. Using arrows that explode or grapple or other such interesting, unconventional arrow uses is another thing you learn in badass 101. Taking out half of a flying aircraft carrier just with arrows is pretty badass. Not looking where you're shooting and still getting a direct hit is commonly considered as badass. Jumping backwards off buildings is badass, I guess. Oh, and taking out Loki even when he thought he'd beaten the arrow... Badass. Badass rating: 9/10
  • Wit- Unfortunately, Hawkeye spends most of his time on screen brainwashed or not speaking. When he does finally get involved in the action, he has a couple of moments that show his wit but mostly he sets up for other people. However, he seems to enjoy hearing the other people being witty which shows he's not devoid of it. Wit rating: 4/10
  • Intelligence- A smart soldier. One must be to have the concentration and capability that Hawkeye shows with his archery. Only a smart man could work out the how to take out a flying aircraft characters with limited arrows. ARROWS. That being said, he's not the brains behind any operation, more of a tool in everyone else's war. Intelligence rating: 6/10 
  • Heart- Considering for half of the movie he's brainwashed by Loki, we see Clint's heart when he comes back to the good side. His friendship with Natasha. His immediate jumping into the deep end. His regret and self hatred after he realises what's happened. we can see all these things come from his heart being in a good place. He's a dedicated agent and he does not want to slip back into a darker world. Heart rating: 7/10
  • Style- Clint has style. As mentioned earlier in the badassery section, he dives out of buildings backwards with only a single arrow to save him, he doesn't always look where he's shooting but he still hits. He even fired at Loki when no one else could get at him. Hawkeye is one stylish mutha effer.  Style rating: 9/10
  • Hotness- Hottest when he's doing is frown/scowl. When he smiles it can seem a bit odd. All the cool stuff he does is hot too... Also, when brainwashed, his eyes don't match the rest of him and that is unattractive and somewhat spooky. Without the weird eyes he'd get a eight, with the eyes he gets a six. And so...  Hotness rating: 7/10

The Hulk/ Dr. Bruce Banner
  • Badassness- Bruce Banner is a calm guy. Well, he's always angry, but he seems calm. He represses whatever monster is inside of him. Sure, he's a genius but that's a bit rubbish in terms of being a badass. However, The Hulk destroys planes in seconds. The Hulk can make even the bravest people hide. The Hulk smashed Loki into the ground and called him a 'puny god' after using him as a rag doll. The Hulk saved Iron Man's life. The Hulk is almost the definition of Badass. Considering both sides of his personality...  Badass rating: 8/10
  • Wit- As Bruce Banner is deeply troubled and angry, he's not the sort of man to participate lightly in jokes. The Hulk, also, is not one to participate in the banter around the office as...well... he's not invited and doesn't talk. Though, Bruce does trick Black Widow into thinking he's gonna blow and he has the occasional dead pan comic line... Wit rating: 2/10
  • Intelligence- Well, there's not really a lot to discuss here. Bruce Banner, as described by Agent Coulson, is like Stephen Hawking... A very smart person. No one knows gamma radiation like him. The only reason he's involved with The Avengers is because he's so intelligent. No one understands what he says most of the time... Well, except Stark. Intelligence rating: 10/10 
  • Heart- The first time we meet Banner in The Avengers, he's nursing people back to health. He rushes across a town at the whim of a little girl. He then goes to help save the world with his intelligence. He never (really) mocks anyone. He saves Iron Man's life but he doesn't mind smashing the hell out of other good guys as The Hulk. His heart is in the right place when he's banner and sometimes when he's The Hulk.  Heart rating: 8/10
  • Style- The Hulk smashes. That is all. Banner gets his work done. That is all. Admittedly, when he controls his transformation into The Hulk, he does it with style and when he is found in a warehouse naked, he handles it with dignity.  Style rating: 3/10
  • Hotness- He's getting on a bit. Greying hair and so on. But he's still got those ruggedly good looks even if they're ageing. However, The Hulk is not attractive. Not at all. So, Banner is smart and a bit of a silver fox. Attractive but also has one of those old-enough-to-be-your-dad vibes.  Hotness rating: 6/10 (Hulk - 1/10)

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