Sunday, 13 May 2012

Which Avenger Is Best ? (Part 1) Black Widow and Captain America (Spoilers)

I'll throw a SPOILER ALERT right here again in case you missed it. Below I review each Avenger and some other important characters to decide who the best is. There will be several systems of voting including:
  • Badassness - How badass are they? I need some DAYYUMM moments. 
  • Wit - Can they make you laugh or banter brilliantly?
  • Intelligence - What smarts do they have?
  • Heart - Are they a team player? What is their limit? Would the sacrifice themselves for the world?
  • Style -  How good do they look while they do what they do?
  • Hotness - Hotness impacts how much we want to watch them...
This will hopefully determine the Best Avenger.

Black Widow/ Agent Romanoff
  • BadassnessBlack Widow/ Agent Romanoff is a secret military agent/ assassin. That's pretty badass on its own. Let alone the fact she can beat up three guys whilst tied to a chair and in her Sunday best. Oh and don't forget killing a guy with her thighs... and using a metal walkway as if it were a gymnast's pole in order to beat the crap out of Clint. She also outsmarts Loki, god of mischief. Yeah, she's pretty badass. Well, until she hides from Hulk... She stops running and panics. That's not badass. Badass rating: 8/10
  • Wit- A more serious member of the team. She's not rich, she's not a god, she's not a super soldier. She's just doing her job and trying to erase the red from her ledger. She has some snarky moments 'I don't see how that's a party' but she focuses more on the task in hand than banter. Wit rating: 3/10
  • IntelligenceShe is smart. She outsmarts Loki, she convinces her opponents that they have the upper hand when she's really getting what she wants. She convinces Banner to come along to join The Avengers and she's smart enough to run when the Hulk comes out. However, she couldn't read Banner when he pretends to be angry and this causes a whole response team to surround the building. Not smart. Intelligence rating: 7/10
  • Heart- She begs for Tony to be okay at the end and she's there for Clint every step of his recovery, she cares about her team mates. She even tries to help Bruce when he starts transforming. But when she panics after the Hulk chases her she sits around crying rather than jumping into action to help her fellow man. All this being said, her primary motive is to complete the mission, even if it is because she wants to erase her past. Heart rating: 7/10
  • StyleThe girl has style. That goes without saying. I mean, fighting three guys in a dress? Killing with thighs? Jumping and flipping past obstacles and onto enemy ships? Yeah, she knows what she's doing and she makes it look good. Even when she panics and runs from Hulk she makes it look good. And her interrogation style is better than any other. Style Rating: 9/10
  • HotnessTo claim that Black Widow isn't hot would be a crime. She is fine. All the time. Always. Her being a badass only makes her more sexy. The scene where she is fighting in a dress is boobiful beautiful. Hothothothothothot. The only time when she's not hot is when she gets scared. It takes away from the badass sex appeal. Hotness rating: 9/10

Captain America/ Steve Rogers
  • Badassness- Well, Captain America. The patriotic hero. He's stronger than any other man and can reflect Thor's hammer with a shield. However, he never really jumped up and said, 'look how badass I am'. No he's more of a get the job done and save the world as quickly and efficiently as possible. Though he does break into S.H.I.E.L.D's weapon locker and break up Thor and Iron Man's fight. And he does kick ass. Badass rating: 5/10
  • Wit- Again, the Cap is more of a straight player. When there's a cat fight breaking out, the Cap is the one who tries to break it up. Yeah, he's that guy. He doesn't understand the modern jokes. He's from a more serious time when duty was the most important thing. Wit rating: 2/10
  • Intelligence- He's a smart guy considering he's 70 years out of his own time zone. He doesn't lack intelligence, he lacks modern understanding. But he knows how to handle a situation. He makes no bad choices and even instructs New York's finest. Though don't let him argue with Stark... He won't understand a word. Intelligence rating: 7/10 
  • Heart- America. The heart of the world. Captain America. The heart of the heart. He tries to save everyone. He puts everyone before himself. Even when beaten to a pulp he carries on. He even shields Black Widow with his shield during an explosion. Heart rating: 10/10
  • Style- Captain America is all about getting things done. Admittedly, when breaking up Thor and Iron Man's fight, he does it like a pro. He swaggers on in, holds his shield up and half the forest falls down. And there is something extremely stylish about throwing the shield. But mainly, his aim is to help. Style rating: 5/10
  • Hotness- Well, in his solo movie, the girl sitting next to me was drooling everytime he was on screen. She did the same in Avengers, but only when he didn't have his head piece on. He's sweet, sensitive, strong, and dedicated. With a super hot body. Hotness rating: 10/10
Can't imagine anyone complaining if
  he gets down on one knee for them...

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