Tuesday, 22 May 2012

Which Avenger Is Best ? (Part 3) Iron Man and Thor (Spoilers)

I'll throw a SPOILER ALERT right here again in case you missed it. Below I review each Avenger and some other important characters to decide who the best is. There will be several systems of voting including:
  • Badassness - How badass are they? I need some DAYYUMM moments. 
  • Wit - Can they make you laugh or banter brilliantly?
  • Intelligence - What smarts do they have?
  • Heart - Are they a team player? What is their limit? Would the sacrifice themselves for the world?
  • Style -  How good do they look while they do what they do?
  • Hotness - Hotness impacts how much we want to watch them...
This will hopefully determine the Best Avenger.

Iron Man/ Tony Stark
  • Badassness- There's something automatically badass about a man who already has everything and yet still chooses to fly around in a metal suit of armour trying to save the world. He risks his life twice in order to help save the world, he takes out Thor mid sentence. He then continued on to fight Thor (and it was epic and badass) He has lasers in his arms, he tries a new method based on Jonah and the whale, he doesn't fall victim to Loki's brainwashing. Oh yeah, and he hacks into S.H.I.E.L.D Badass rating: 10/10
  • Wit- Everything Stark says drips in wit and sarcasm. Creating an original Shakespeare in order to mock Thor, congratulating The Cap and his efforts with modern technology, being confused when Agent Coulson is called Phil ('His first name is Agent') He's just a funny guy and a cocky bastard. They say you have to be smart to be witty... Stark has that down. Wit rating: 10/10
  • Intelligence- Inventing a suit of armour that builds itself around you as you walk along a platform is pretty smart. Making it build around you as you fall out of the sky, is pretty smart. Inventing a flying suit of armour in the first place is pretty smart. He hacks into S.H.I.E.L.D and discovers their secrets and his intelligence has made him ridiculously rich. He's the only person that can understand Banner when they talk... science. Intelligence rating: 10/10 
  • Heart- Tony Stark does not play well with others. This is evident throughout the film. He's rude, sarcastic, puts everyone at risk by poking fun at banner. Despite all this, he loves Pepper Pots and he risks his life numerous times in order to help or save the team/world. It takes a lot of guts to fly a bomb into a portal to another world that is closing behind you, especially when your suit is almost out of power.  Heart rating: 7/10
  • Style- Tony Stark handles everything with a surrounding presence of cool. He offers an evil god of mischief a drink. He flew into the mouth of a giant alien creature and blew it up from the inside. Just everything is done with style. However, his carelessness (particularly with Banner) is stupid. It's not cool and he gets immature. It's a good thing he has those super cool and stylish hologram computers. Style rating: 9/10
  • Hotness- Well, he's cocky and that confidence and arrogance is somewhat attractive. However, he is getting on. Again, like Banner, he looks old enough to be half the viewers' dad but I'm sure they all 'would'. Plus he's an action hero and a genius. Rather attractive qualities to most people I am sure.  Hotness rating: 8/10

  • Badassness- Well, he's from a different realm and he's had to get his father to conjure up enough power to send him to Earth and on top of that he's a god. Why did he return? Simply to collect his jackass of a brother. All of that to get his brother. He then proceeds to fight Iron Man and attempts to attack Captain America. When he's involved with the team, he works well with others. No rouge side here, but he'll still kick your ass. Badass rating: 8/10
  • Wit- A god does not participate in the childish banter of the mere mortals. In fact, he stands to the side and points out how petty they all are. He just want's to return Loki to Asgard without too much hassle. Evidently, Loki was always the more outspoken one and Thor was a bit more serious. Wit rating: 2/10
  • Intelligence- He has knowledge beyond our realm. He understands space and the stars better than any astrologer. But yet, here on Earth, he is a bit out of place. This is mostly shown in his solo movie (smashing coffee mugs, ordering a dog to ride) but, again, his main task is to collect his naughty brother and hand him over to the justice system in Asgard. I suppose you could say his intelligence is relative to the context surrounding him Intelligence rating: 6/10 
  • Heart- Family comes first. Always. Despite his brother killing dozens upon dozens of people, he still stands by and states his love for him. He has no wish to kill him, only arrest him. And one of the first things he does when beginning to work with S.H.I.E.L.D is he checks that Jane is okay (from his solo movie). Yes, family and friends are important. But he's also quick to angry or offend. Bless well spoken Thor. Heart rating: 8/10
  • Style- He wears a cape. If that's not stylish then I don't know what is. Also, he talks with such grace and grandness that you can't help but love everything he says. He can make his hammer fly around the room into his hand and, oh yeah, his weapon of choice is a hammer. Now that's stylish. He also stops The Avengers mid flight to get his brother back and starts a group brawl. Though he doesn't handle it quite as well as Iron Man. If only he had more cool stunts to do.  Style rating: 8/10
  • Hotness- When fully clad in his armour, it leaves a lot to the imagination, perhaps too much. Some girls go crazy for long blonde, wild hair but not all. In his solo movie he is adorable at the same time as being smoking hot. Something about the human clothing that makes him more attractive. The armour seems a bit over the top. But still, look at those arm muscles. It would be impossible to claim they're not hot. Hotness rating: 7/10

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